This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
