He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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