i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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