I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
