Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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