no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
