how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Sorry about my life...
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
