ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Randomize
