is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
