If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize