Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
