Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I queefed so loud it echoed.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
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