Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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