Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
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