so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
