Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
