3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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