So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
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