guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Where did you get a picture of my penis
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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