You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
