he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
