I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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