whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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