Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
