the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize