I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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