i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
