I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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