i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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