he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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