is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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