she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
