im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Fuck appropriateness.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
