you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize
