I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Randomize
