Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
