The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
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