piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Randomize
