If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
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