He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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