I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
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