he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
