She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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