Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
