How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize