Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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