South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
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