I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
