He is an equal opportunity slut.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
