TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
