Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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