he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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